[Verse 1] From a village so small you could sneeze it away, Came Dorky the goblin, bright-eyed and fey. With a backpack too big and a map upside-down, He marched toward the city — and tripped into town. [Verse 2] He wore shiny buttons and mismatching shoes, Asked “Is this a dungeon?” (it was a public loo). He signed up for quests with a confident grin, Though he fainted first time he saw goblin-skin. [Chorus] Dorky! Dorky! Brave little bean! Polished his boots till the pavement was clean! He’s kind, he’s keen, he once fought a broom, And somehow got knighted for tidying a room! [Verse 3] He trained with a sword (it was taller than him), Declared “I’m a ranger!” (then fell off the gym). He tried casting magic — with a stick and a shout, Set his own pants on fire, then politely bowed out. [Verse 4] But Dorky helped elders cross bridges and moats, Untangled a goose from some wizard’s old coats. He once hugged a troll 'til it gave up the fight, Then invited it home for some mushroom delight. [Chorus – louder now, with laughter!] Dorky! Dorky! Green-hearted knight! Waves at the bandits, and tells them “Sleep tight!” He’s small, he’s sweet, trips over his feet, But the city just smiles when they hear him squeak “Neat!” [Bridge – slow and sweet] He’s never told lies, never taken a thing, Just dreams of adventures and maybe a ring — To give to a partner he hasn't yet met, But wrote a whole poem and trained a vignette. [Final Chorus – clapping, stomping, mugs in the air!] Dorky! Dorky! Hero of song! Can’t tell left from right, but he’s never done wrong! He’s bright, polite, and full of pure heart, Now raise up your mugs for Dorky the Smart!"